An open letter to the pisser.

To the Pisser,

I have tried to be cool about this attempted to move my heart and mind in the direction that you dont want to be this way. I want to believe that you have a problem; a defect, a piercing, a medical excuse for your actions but last night my mind in other places you caught me in your trap and now I hate you. Why do you do what you do? Do you feel like you are some how sticking it to the company? Who do you picture you are peeing on when you piddle up puddles of urine for the innocent to slosh in? Have you been wronged by the maintenance staff and this is your way of punishing them and us all? 

This is an open letter to the Pisser the guy that just stands and pees into the wall right next to a urinal as if it wasn't even there. Maybe you are mad at the urinal you though she was your one and only till you saw the pubic hair of another man? Was that all the proof of infidelity you needed and now you piss on the wall right in front of her to show how you dont need that bitch anymore? I want you to know in a moment of absent mindedness I stepped in your leavings my pant cuff, soaked by your waste the sickening smell of urine and  squeak of shoe on wet tile. I knew without looking it was you. This has been going on as long as I have worked at this job almost 4 years now and you have never hit the target maybe its time you sat down and took a load off literally. What your doing is horrible and unsanitary and probably cancer causing. And I just want you to know in all sincerity, from the bottom of my heart,  if I find you I will stand on your nuts and tie your dick in a knot. 

Sincerely,

Me the guy with a pair of pants he will never wear again.